Sunday, March 31, 2013

I've Missed You. (No, Really, I Have)

He has risen and so have I. (Happy Easter, everyone!)

I can't believe it's been two weeks since I last blogged. (Remember when I said I would blog every day? Ha!) My absence is certainly not on purpose, and it's not like I haven't thought about you, my dear readers, these last few weeks. Things have just been busy work-wise, which isn't really something I can complain about, given that I'm trying to re-establish my freelance career. (I'll have proof of my absence soon when some of the articles I've been laboring over are published.)

One thing I've realized is that the busier you are the less time you have for some personal reflection -- which could really be made into an argument for all of us taking a chill pill from time to time, but I digress. With so much obligation, work-wise or otherwise, it's a bit of brain drain to the point that when you have a few free minutes, all you want to do is zone out, not necessarily contemplate life, which is what this blog is all about. 

Hence why there's not really a point to this post either. Still, I'm just happy to be back, and hope you're glad to see me, too.

More soon.

Friday, March 15, 2013

Nagging Questions

I'm not a big believer in signs, but two big questions have been coming up a lot for me lately and so therefore are hard to ignore. 

Part of the genesis of these questions has to do with a series of articles I'm working on, and part of it has to do with the advice I've been seeking on my own as part of my current career-centric soul-searching. (And for the record, the people asking these questions are not new-age hippies.)

The first: Am I successful? 

Having recently been laid off and see my income drop dramatically, the obvious answer would be no. But it turns out, the best measure of my success is one that I never considered.
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The second question, which I now realize is inarguably tied to the first, is just as easily answerable:

How happy are you? 

Truth be told, I'm pretty darn happy right now.

How does this net out, you might be wonder?

No doubt about it, certain things are a bit unstable, and I don't have everything I want at the moment, but overall I'm feeling fulfilled in the work that I'm doing, which is something I haven't felt in a long time. I'm really enjoying just simply writing and editing again, and I like the flexibility that freelance is affording me.

And when I consider the network I've built through my career, and how invaluable they've all been to me this past month, I feel incredibly lucky. This network helps me stay afloat -- and I'm talking about my confidence as well as my finances here.
 
Freelancing isn't a path I've purposefully chosen to follow, but I certainly can't complain that I am on it at the moment. I'm realizing a lot about what I value both personally and professionally, and more important, I have a better understanding of what I want to make of my life, both personally and professionally. And the interesting thing is, these conclusions are ones I never would have expected to come to.

So maybe it's time to condense these two questions: Am I successful at being happy?

The answer is, absolutely.

Photo: Deposit Photos

I wonder: Are you successful at being happy?

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Being a Stay-at-Home Mom Is Hard

Not that I am one. But I'm getting a taste of life as one -- minus the kids, of course.

Since getting up at 6:30 this morning I have:
  • Dropped off dry cleaning
  • Gone to the gym (Hey, I may not be wearing makeup every day, so I should still try to look somewhat good for my man in other ways, right?)
  • Made breakfast; ate said breakfast
  • Taken a shower
  • Figured out tonight's dinner
  • Started laundry
  • Paid bills
  • Followed up on lingering health insurance issues
  • Made lunch; ate said lunch
  • Finished laundry 
  • Folded laundry 
  • Did the dishes from breakfast and lunch
And I still have to go grocery shopping, make dinner, and do some freelance work, ideally all before the husband gets home by 6 p.m. It's exhausting, and very early Mad Men, and I don't even have a little one around who needs my constant attention. How women with children pull this off on a daily basis is beyond me. (And yes, I realize that me being able to do things like go to the gym, take a shower, and even blog, are considered a luxury in mom world.)

As a corporate drone, I often fantasized about that time when we did have kids, and I would be at home with them, and it would be soooo easy -- especially nap time, because that is when I would sit on the couch, eat some bonbons and watch soaps. The keyword here is "fantasized," because I know being a SAHM isn't easy, and it's likely that I will not be a SAHM mom at all, but a working mom, admittedly out of necessity more so than desire.

I've been wanting to write about this subject for a while now, because it's a topic I think about a lot, especially now, with my career in limbo. And thanks to all the press around Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg's new book and Yahoo! CEO Marissa Mayer's recent decree, the whole topic of work-life balance is at the top of everyone's mind again.

But the truth is, Sandberg and Mayer don't have it all figured out. And if they say they do, they're lying because if they did, we'd all be doing what they do. I've talked to a lot of working moms (granted not exactly of Sandberg's or Mayer's wealth or status) and they readily admit that they don't know how to achieve this elusive work-life balance -- and these women have kids as old as 16. So if none of these women can figure it out, why the hell should I expect to? As far as I can tell from these conversations, the trick is to make it look like you've got it all under control.

With that said, whether or not your married, whether or not you have children, life can get bananas. And so...

I wonder: How do you balance it all?

Sunday, March 10, 2013

Daylight Savings Sucks

There is nothing I hate more than being thrown off schedule and that is exactly what daylight savings does. I know I'm not the only one to detest daylight savings -- it turns out cows don't like it much either. Writes Bora Zivkovic in the Scientific American:
Come Sunday morning, when the milking machines get attached to their udders a whole hour too early, the otherwise placid bovines on dairy farms around the United States will snort in surprise and dismay. They may give less milk than usual. They could take days or weeks to get used to the new milking schedules.
Zikovic argues that humans are no different, and that having to "spring forward" and "fall back" every few months not only messes with our sleep and social schedules, but with our life, too:
Chronobiologists who study circadian rhythms know that for several days after the spring-forward clock resetting – and especially that first Monday – traffic accidents increase, workplace injuries go up and, perhaps most telling, incidences of heart attacks rise sharply. Cases of depression also go up.
While I had no idea chronobiologists exist, I can attest that, personally, that first Monday after springing-forward is mired in grumpiness and clumsiness as my body adjusts to beginning its work an hour earlier than usual.

So why do we do it? Zikovic sees no good reason, calling b.s. on the argument that it helps conserve energy. But perhaps even more telling, Zikovic points out that we still do daylight savings because no one seems to know who has authority over abolishing this ancient rule.

So looks like we'll be doing DST until the cows come home.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

I Have a Confession to Make

I'm going to admit something here that I've only told to a handful of people. I've only confided in these select few because it's a bit embarrassing for me, but after confessing, the majority of them react with something along the lines of, "Ohmygod meeee tooooo!" and we are forever bonded. So I feel confident coming clean now, because I know I'm not alone, and there's nothing to be ashamed of.

You ready? Okay, here goes:

I like watching CBS Sunday Morning. And truthfully, largely because I really enjoy the 60-second nature segments at the end of the program. (Yeah, I said it -- program.)

In case you're unfamiliar, CBS Sunday Morning is a show geared toward old people. I envision the people other than me who watch it do so shuffling around in a bathrobe, possibly even with a walker, possibly even in a nursing home. The host is Charles Osgood, an 80-year-old with a fondness for bow ties, and who also can be found on that other old-person favorite, the radio.  Segments largely focus on the arts, and the likes of Ben Stein and Mo Rocca contribute, though I often wonder if your average viewer even knows who these two are outside of the show.

Shocked? Yeah, I always am too when someone else admits an admiration for the show that's only a year older than I am. (It first aired Jan. 28, 1979.) Perhaps even more shocking is how we all quietly confess that we actually make an effort to be in front of the TV at that designated hour each Sunday morning. And while I won't out anyone here publicly, let's just say my kindred run the gamut from the 20-something you'd never expect was even up at 10 a.m. on a Sunday to the guy who could knock the lights out of 90 percent of the population in a single punch -- and would enjoy doing it. 

But just as I'm not alone in being a person under the age of 75 who regularly watches the show, nor am I alone in being able to explain why we find the show enjoyable. They don't ask hard questions of their interview subjects, and I often find the segments to be a bit behind the times -- literally. I often find myself thinking as I watch, "Oh, how cute. The Times wrote about that three weeks ago."

So while I can't say for sure, I happen to think the enjoyment in watching the show goes back to that comfort thing, like we're spending Sunday morning with our grandparents over breakfast.

Not that I ever did that. But it sure sounds nice. Particularly if fancy bow ties are involved.

Photo: 1337x.org

I wonder: What "old person" show do you enjoy watching?

Sunday, March 3, 2013

March, I'm So Glad You're Here

Yes sir, that's the life

That's actually the lead lyric for one of my favorite songs by The Reputation:
"March I'm so glad you're here/where have you been all my life/it's funny how everyone acts like this has never happened before"
For the last few years, February has been a mixed bag of personal highs and lows, with particularly significant events occurring on Leap Day. I'm not sure why February is filled with kickers for me, but that seems to be the trend as of late. So after a particularly trying month, I was lucky enough to have a husband who realized I -- we -- needed a break, and so we jetted off to San Juan, Puerto Rico, for a few days, hence the radio silence on the blog, loyal readers.

The vacation, however short, was everything I needed: the only thing on the agenda was that there was no agenda, and for the first time in a long time, I could simply do nothing.

Because despite being laid off, "nothing" certainly isn't something I've been doing much of in these last few weeks since the news broke -- and it's paid off. It seems the career crisis the lay off caused has righted itself for the time being: Beginning this week, I start a part-time editing gig filling in for someone on maternity leave. Barring any more unexpected bombs, I have a bit of security for the next four months, which has put me a little at ease (and allotted me more time to figure things out).

So while I was loathe to end a vacation that warmed me in more ways than one, I knew that once it was over, March would be here, and for that, I am glad.

As for February? You can eff off for the next 11 months.

Photo: Me

I wonder: Is there a particular month you find trying?